My name is Antonio Rosas. When I was 18 years old, I committed a crime that would put me in jail to serve a sentence of Life without the possibility of Parole (LWOP), a fate I would have never predicted.
My family and I lived in Porterville and I had a pretty good upbringing. My dad was a farmer from Mexico and my mom stayed home and took care of my sister and me. My parents were very religious and we attended church services regularly. I hung out with the kids in my neighborhood and my life was good.
One of the guys I became tight with was Edward. His father was an alcoholic and always had beer in the refrigerator. So we would sneak and drink his beer. This behavior would be the start of a rough road for me.
As I got older, I started to hang out with Alfonso. I no longer attended regular school; I was in a continuation and receiving good grades. As a reward for my grades, my parents bought me a car. But even with that, I just couldn’t stay on the right track. I was disobeying my parents and being rebellious.
Alfonso and I were out one night and he told me that he had stolen a shotgun. Later on that night while walking to Alfonso’s house, we saw two young men walking towards us. As a joke, I said lets tell them this is a stick up. I didn’t think there were any shells left in the shotgun because we had gone into the woods and practiced shooting it. I told one of the guys, “this is a hold up, give me your money.”, and he continued to walk by me.
It was at that moment that I heard a loud shot. When I turned around, Ricardo was on the ground, Alfonso had had shot him. When I asked him why he did it, he just looked at me and said nothing. I prayed that he would survive. My intentions were never to hurt anybody.
When I went to prison for this crime, I was 18 years old, selfish and uneducated. All I could think about was how I was going to survive in prison for the rest of my life. In 1990, I started to attend self-help groups. I was trying to understand why I had committed that crime. What was wrong with me? I now have insight into my past and the reasons that lead me to becoming the ugly person that I was.